A bit Strange

People make to kill everything strange we have in us by responsibilities and social laws to understand us better..............
Moments like these you want to be a bit stranger, because you get sick of understanding everyone or everything or pretending that you do so. Moments like these you want to sit in the sofa looking out of the window and listening to the magic sounds of Moonlight Sonata. Moments like these you eager to be alone and no one`s smile will make you feel warmer because in these rare moments every sound of your own soul takes you somewhere far from all usual things and you discover the magic part of the world. Moments like these words are said in vain and the pain you have seems sweeter than anyone`s insincere hug and your great wish to create something lead you to do incredible things that will explain yourself that you haven.t killed yet everything strange you have. You listen and listen to the sounds of life and your all scares disappeared somewhere and you remember that craziness is too much useful for the health of our mind, so impossible, unbelievable are words that make us not to take a risk. But only that risk can become the taste of your life and you want to discover an island not to live there alone during your whole life but to find the treasures that one of the kings has kept there long time before.
Moments like these you find out that you have a great patience to listen to yourself and you need no words to explain what you feel. There is not a deadlock, there is not a final point, there are ways that always take you somewhere, and maybe in any cross-road you will meet someone familiar or a close soul, so in these rare moments you will get known with a type of an organization that calls The Union OF Souls. I am going to find a job there.

Your Fault

To be alone with your shadow is so painful as if the whole world has gathered to judge me. I have broken a law but I am not going to protect my rights as the nature will do it for me and it`s not my fault. Maybe people blame me, but only desires rule the world and not the naive people who are so powerless that they don`t want to believe in it. Every action is someone`s desire, passion, wish, dream and only the existence of them can make mankind get the sense of everything.
You are not the sense I am looking for but I feel something and it`s not my fate, it`s yours fault. I want you to be a foreigner, because I don`t care for people whom I don`t know, but you seem so close that sometimes I have a great wish to ran far from you. You scare me because you want to find out who I am, but even I don`t know, so don`t try.

I know

There are things that I don`t know, but I know that everything is so simple to make complicated that people prefer to hate and not to love. I know the world, and the way I know it, will never be discovered because there are several types of the view to the world. Everything is the matter of our values and world view we have. In this world there are things that I will never do and people who do it, become a foreigner. I wander and the ways I choose are sometimes the wrong ones, but they are the results of my own choice and people who are so lazy that don`t want to find their ways are people of non-importance. I have fallen so many times that it has become something usual for me, I have lost so many games but I know that I`ll play again. It`s the passion of our life.
It`s no matter how hard we try, people always hurt us, maybe they don`t do it on purpose, maybe even they don`t guess, or even don`t care, but they hurt and you can`t change the fact, you pretend that everything is ok, but you lie, you know that someday, when you meet one of them you will not be able to smile and to greet. It`s no matter how hard you try, things will change, people will change too, everything will be different, and you will not be able to go back to the past to change things, so don`t care of the things you can`t change. Let`s use or efforts to change our future>
I know I have to do this. It`s my own way to see and feel the Life.

A magic week

It is something like miracle. There are so many new things to enjoy and see, and find and remember. I am afraid to miss something, to lose the chance I am given. I can breathe deeply and can close and open my eyes and see a city behind me, a city that is always beautiful during days and nights, a city that takes us to a magic part of our common life. I don`t want to change anything because everything seems as perfect as our Life is. I guess I can walk and walk in the streets and never get tired, I can enjoy everything and never get satisfied. So magic moments of Life is entirely connected with the city I haven`t been before and maybe I`ll never be again, and though even it won`t manage to know me, I know it`ll be one of my best friends, because it is giving me much than anyone else can take.
This city has been witness of so many stories, kings and queens and it has the smell of the Middle Ages, so the fresh and old has been mixed in the streets of the city and everyone can admire this atmosphere. So many thoughts are created here and maybe no one will discover it, but there is something that is certain: our memories will be durable during whole our life.
From my diary
22.02.2012